פורום טיפול מיני בתפוז
פורום מקצועי שבו צוות מרפאת דר' אלוני משיב לשאלות ופניות גולשים בנושאי מין ומיניות
Is it possible to learn how to be a good partner
Being single can be a temporary or permanent situation. Sometimes this is as a result of choices we make and sometimes it’s an outcome of living in a society which places an emphasis on, and reinforces family values, thereby often putting pressures on singles to find a partner and settle down.
The majority of singles, both those who have never been in a significant relationship and those who have experienced such a relationship and have broken it off, aspire to be part of a fulfilling, supportive, friendly and stable intimate relationship. Many believe that they "just haven’t had any luck" in finding a suitable partner, or, that the circumstances of their life haven't allowed for the ultimate relationship to develop. This can lead to them projecting the responsibility for their situation onto external factors rather than taking it upon themselves to build relationships.
It is true that fate has an important part to play in initially meeting “the right person” but from that moment on, fate has no part in determining whether the couple will be willing and able to build a relationship.
Frequently, individuals lack relationship building skills and as a result tend to block opportunities which come their way without any intent or awareness of having done so. It may result from a low self image, buried deep inside, or sometimes it may be the result of a poor body image which is hampering the ability to make a connection.
People sometimes draw on a wide range of excuses who's purpose is to prevent creating intimacy and communicates fear of closeness with a partner, difficulties in giving trust and fear of rejection. Some individuals who carry a 'dark' secret are as a result preventing any closeness because they feet that revealing the secret would lead to disgust and abandonment by their partner.
Men and women who grew up in households in which their parents' relationship was not a positive role model of a desirable relationship, often hold back from creating relationships because they incorrectly believe that it is destined to follow a similar path. For people like this a relationship can cause them to withdraw, even if they are not aware of it.
Indeed many of our patients are highly successful individuals who for these reasons tend to linger in the background rather than socializing.
There are also individuals who have difficulties expressing themselves in private conversations and meetings. In today's society which is so heavily based on communication the first interaction between two people often takes place on the telephone and by sounding hesitant and staccato, even on the phone, such people lower the chance of a first meeting eventuating. Such an individual can find him or himself stuck in a vicious circle from which it is extremely hard to break.
Holding back from relationships and repressing the topic can, with time, develop into a sense of anxiety. The lack of experience, sexual or otherwise, with a partner only grows worse with the result that as time passes the gap between the individual's capabilities and the expectation of the society which surrounds them widens.
In order to live as a couple each partner needs to know how to make an intimate connection, how to solve problems, how to compromise whilst at the same time retaining independence and individuality within the relationship.
These are skills which can be learnt and practiced – but without them, the attempt to create a relationship will likely be much more difficult if not doomed.
שאלות של גברים
התלונות הנפוצות אצל גברים הפונים למרפאה לטיפול מיני הן:
- שפיכה מוקדמת
- מצבי זקפה משתנים
- חשש מגודלו של הפין
- חשש מאינטימיות
- חרדת נטישה
- שפיכה מעוקבת
- חשש מהפות הנשי
- חוסר השלמה עם נטייה הומוסקסואלית
- בתוליות מאוחרת